Funny Birthday Poems
into the mirror all.my dentures fit you're "here after",
when you look all, I just can't remember it bifocals,to get something... then wonder what , are getting old all, I've done it • I like my
the "here-after". you go somewhere Text from websites:
• You know you all, I've heard it
• You're not old. You're chronologically gifted.time thinking about Now, you can follow
cabinet.• At my age, I've seen it merely standing up. --Bob Hope
a lot of check out our:in the medicine
with time!weightlifting consists of when you spend
Don't forget to and not enough
fine wine; it gets better age when your are getting old
be used 37, 64, etc.in the house • Age is like
• You know you’ve reached middle • You know you correct age (and math, if appropriate). Any age can
too much room maturity.
middle-aged men.for.
sayings, but substitute the when you have to pay for
a lot of wait in line
• Use the same are getting old
very high price boys, and so will
are willing to • Happy 30-Something! (or Happy 40-Something!, Happy 50-Something!, etc.)
• You know you
• Age is a • Boys will be
fewer things you
• Great at 80!winded playing chess.unlisted.of it. --Doris Daywhen there are
• Spectacular at 70
when you get
number, and mine is knowledge that you'll grow out
are getting old
• Sexy at 60are getting old
• Age is a
age is the • You know you
than you do.• You know you your head.
thing about middle your kids
goes out more
wife.
number, old is in • The really frightening
See all five of our birthday pages
to bed before • Life after 50: when your back
street is your • Age is a crisis!!!
when you go Fabulous Fifties!helped across the
don't mind, it don't matter!
has been a are getting old
• Welcome to the old gray-haired lady you and if you
• Mid-life crisis? My whole life • You know you
• Nifty at Fifty!when the little
matter of mind an elevator!
you still don't feel good.age. --Victor Hugo
are getting old
• Age is a favorite songs in
bad habits and
youth of old • You know you are.you hear your up all your youth; Fifty is the
it.
how old you the hill until
when you give
old age of be reminded of
get used to • You're not over
are getting old • Forty is the
is not to 10 years to
bald they don't recognize you. - Bennett Cerf
• You know you
- you discover you're old!
for our birthday • It takes about
and wrinkled and over...
age of discovery
thing we want excuse.
are so gray and over and
• 50 is the when the only
up some other when your classmates
at telling stories; over and over
answer!)• We know we're getting old
have to think
• Middle age is
when you're very good • I'm 39 1/2 (and that's my final
DULL evening.
More Funny Birthday Poems
once. After that you eating. - Arnold Bennettare getting old rehearsal!forward to a • You're only young three years in
• You know you
40, it's just a when you look
approach eighteen. --Mark Twain
bed and over either.• Up to age
are getting old eighty and gradually
twenty years in they can't remember them • 40, but still Sporty!
• You know you the age of
sixty has spent your friends because • I'm not 40, I'm 39.95, plus tax!
rocking chair started!be born at • A man of
are safe with birthday!you can't get your
we could only them down. - T. S. Eliotwhen your secrets
of your 21st • You know you're old when
infinitely happier if enough to turn are getting old
the 19th anniversary do!• Life would be
are not decrepit
• You know you • Here's to celebrating often than you
your marvels. --Merry Browne
do things, and yet you as good.
look this good!goes out more
you've lost all being asked to to look half
40 years to when your back
• You know you're old when are the hardest. You are always twice as long
• It took me • You know you're getting old
what happened.fifty and seventy
when it takes
perfect 10's!be a nap!
young person wondering • The years between
are getting old • Forty is 4
when "Happy Hour" turns out to
person is a
Funny 40th Birthday Poem
to wear out, fall out, or spread out.• You know you • Forty isn't old - IF you're a tree!are getting old • Inside every older when everything starts premiums.years, 20 in spirit!
• You know you snowball. --Doug Larson
• Middle age is of the insurance
• I'm 40 in when everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work!
to throw a it isn't for you. --Ring Lardner
sports car because was sooo old. You were right!
are getting old
get the urge and you hope
when you don't want a you thought 40
• You know you if you never
the telephone rings are getting old were little and
stay immature indefinitely!in its grasp
Saturday night and
• You know you • Remember when you
young once, but you can
has you firmly
sitting home on work.40!• You are only • The aging process when you are a lot more 10, I'm a perfect I grew up!• After fifty it's patch, patch, patch.
• Middle age is
fun--and fun is of 1 to
to be when
fence!to the net. --Franklin P. Adams
a lot less
• On a scale
things I wanted pastures, you can't climb the
to rush up when work is 22 years experience.
one of the you find greener
and too old are getting old
• 40: I'm 18 with
• Wrinkled was not • By the time take up golf
• You know you Milestone Birthday Yearsinto shredded wheat?
apart.too young to
from the couch.it! Happy Birthday!wild oats turn body is falling when you are
to get up
to think of • When did my and now my
• Middle age is you two tries older . . . You are, of course, but it's best not
used to be.my head together not.
when it takes yourself as getting
get, the better I • I finally got but would rather
are getting old
• Don't think of
• The older I • Aged to Perfection!much as ever • You know you golden years...I'm not impressed.difference.
• More candles: Bigger wish!
can do as USED to cost.• So, these are the
to tell the it!life when one
gallon of gas run me over.
and the eyesight the hill - I can't get up
a period of people what a or trying to
I do;• I'm not over • Middle age is
find yourself telling passing me by the ones that
used to be.it. --Oscar Wilde
when you frequently if life is
to run into • Nostalgia isn't what it
to get over are getting old • I can't figure out
the good fortune out!
time than have • You know you
victim of gravity!
anyway;than to rust have a good
at 2 a.m. is indigestion.
• I'm not old; I'm just a I never liked to wear out he'd rather not reason you’re still awake on the YOUNG!forget the people • It is better a man's life when
when the only • Youth is wasted
the senility tonew friends!
that period in are getting old
a roller coaster.God grant me
good thing. You're always meeting • Middle age is
• You know you once got from
• Senility Prayer
• Senility is a earlier. --Daniel Bennett
the crowd.chair that you
of it!your children's advice.
get you home early to beat
from a rocking • Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most is listening to
one that will concerts and ballgames
the same sensation still cookin'!about growing old
and choosing the
when you leave when you get • Over 40 and
• The worst thing of two temptations
are getting old • You're getting old speed!
jar!
having the choice
• You know you other places!hill, you pick up help opening the • Middle age is are down there.• Young at heart, slightly older in • Once you're over the cut the mustard...I just need the fiber, not the toy!do while you Social Security.for sissies. --Bette Davis
• I can still
your cereal for
you need to youngest starts collecting
• Old age ain't no place the alternatives. --Maurice Chevalierwhen you choose
is anything else old when your and vigor.
when you consider • Middle age is yourself if there • You know your
treachery beat youth not so bad
waist change places.the floor, and then ask as your grandson.
• Old age and • Old age is
narrowness of the something up off
the same age far.
your age. --Lucille Ballthe mind and over to pick
your doctor is to go very to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about
when broadness of when you lean are old when a lot, but fortunately it's too weak
staying young is • Middle age is are getting old
• You know you • My mind wanders • The secret of
of someone else.
• You know you
in M.D.and TV!am. --Bernard M. Baruchacquaintance reminds you sausage.only names ending Now it's beer, the old lady older than I that every new your pancakes and black book contains be wine, women and song,always 15 years so many people longer than eating when your little • It used to • To me, old age is age, you've already met morning pills takes
are getting old
what happened!
of myself!you reach middle
when taking your • You know you young person wondering
taken better care • By the time are getting old
belt won't.person is a
this long, I would have again!
• You know you buckle and your • Inside every older
going to live wind it up room.
when your knees long time!known I was
clock, but you can walks into the are getting old
young a very • If I had turn back the your stomach in, no matter who
• You know you • I'm not old, I've just been the tea kettle.
be able to
trying to hold girl.
teenager!get are from • You may not
when you quit see a pretty • I'm not old, I'm a recycled only whistles you
hill?!are getting old door when you older, I'm getting bitter.hill when the • Over the hill? I don't remember any • You know you
opens the garage
• I'm not getting • You know you're over the
• So many candles, so little cake!
a challenge.when your pacemaker used to be.
it is.recount!speed limits as
are getting old old as I sometimes forget what
old! I demand a longer think of • You know you • I'm not as
now since I
• I'm not that when you no middle-aged.
• I'm not aging, I'm marinating!
age is easier be this old!
are getting old
begin to look old ladies body!• Lying about my
• Too young to • You know you
when your children girl, locked in an
roast a turkey!wrinkles!in style.
are getting old
16 year old
candles. Now I could older. I just collect back in style... have come back • You know you • I'm just a over my birthday • I'm not getting until they come to repeat yourself.
in my bottom!could toast marshmallows
remember right now.
you've put away when you tend
teeth and lead a kid I
you can't seem to when the clothes
are getting oldhair, gold in my
• When I was few other things
are getting old You know you
"metallic years"; silver in my with it.
grouchy, you just don't like ttraffic, waiting, crowds, lawyers, loud music, unruly kids, barking dogs, politicians and a • You know you
to repeat yourself.
• I'm entering the like and stick
when you're not really on the patio.
when you tend
than under it.
See All Five of Our Birthday Pages
age you really are getting old out is sitting
are getting oldover the hill
to find an • You know you of a night
• You know you • I'd rather be staying young is
Christmas.
when your idea
bifocals.
service.
• The secret to
want socks for
are getting old
sun hitting your offers same day
juice is working!
when you actually
• You know you
is from the
photographic memory. Unfortunately, it no longer
action" means your prune
are getting old
police.
in your eyes • I have a
"getting a little
• You know you of by the
when the gleam
optional!• You know you're old when flight of stairs.your doctor instead are getting old
mandatory. Growing up is miss my mind!walking DOWN a slow down by • You know you • Growing old is
but Lord I out of breath when you're cautioned to you.into your body!is perfect,when you run
are getting old "old person" looking back at old person crawl my hearing aid are getting old
• You know you to see that • Don't let an me fine,• You know you and then can and are shocked • Classic, Genuine, Antique Person!be.
• You know you • You know you when you turn a party and at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake and SayingsFun & Free Stuff
New Categories!Magnet Categories › ›at this site.poetry:and happy.
funnyI pray that I will oftenI pray that that includes wishes for a birthday regifting.
those bumps, out comes…eewww!Then there’s the pimple-popping toy,large piece of makes toast with are weird,plus a lot
birthday poem.can be about To see the Curious about the jerk;grow older take try.
In the beginning your birth.Your life should it applies.factor really limits on the general is designed for
By Karl Fuchsthinking grows stronger,easier for us fight,getting bigger fast.hope that I and stop causing So I wish I'm old enough good relationship, where the recipient poem is written
Over the hill Thank goodness for So then I be told.make her old,And even shed
My mother has makes me proud,To Mom from for specific family By Joanna Fuchs
a smile;be at your A real piece Your fall from your friends in You’ll make a to be a
many people drink I want two! I can’t? But why?""This is really the gifts pile But Why?This free funny
May your birthday always charm;qualities outshine them Along came you.Columbus was a them. It's a funny poem, a rhyming poem, reminds us that
That "hill" will be out the hill at But for you, the music is Time goes twice birthday;find it offensive, please let me
the hill funny must have done And me, I know they’re swell.to me;see,great for me,
This free funny in the hearse!worse.Yes getting older you have to is not such we used to
Getting Older Birthdayon advancing age. These "Over the Hill" funny birthday verses To have your Okay; that’s good; you’re finished;Bora Bora;Mexican Beaches;
(Well, maybe taste, but don’t you chew!)Do yoga in Bike the USA;fitness freaks and By Joanna FuchsYou're birthday gifted
important we leave;reflect,Funny birthday poems This page of break!
a glad occasion;People you don't even like;funny birthday poem? I hope not!By Joanna Fuchsand have it the country, fast.(what IS that, anyway?);
you could possibly sleep;the candles.b) your love handles the mirror to The Day After a birthday celebration. It's a funny tickle your funny
more logical location snow.ones.are getting old when you have when people call
Funny Birthday Quotes (autumn, winter, Halloween, Thanksgiving, New Year's, Valentine's Day, Easter, more)Photo Mint Tins:Bookmark Categoriesfor details.
than 800 poems pages of birthday finds you peaceful and find life smile.I pray that On your birthday,
as a prayer lot of searches you to start
When you press like elf ears.
etched in a The toaster that your birthday gifts
everything you need
free verse funny Funny birthday verst
faith?By Karl Fuchsdon't be a So as you laugh if you out and tall.
you've done since stuff and frown;you to whom of the cards, and the age write these; there's another one the recipient. This birthday poem Happy Birthday!
you live your It will be you want to Your brain is There’s a strong
can grow bigger in size.Oh Yeah, Happy Birthdaylot younger, hopefully in a
reverse. This funny birthday By Karl Fuchsmom taught me.About the world, you see,If the truth She says they day she’ll ponder life,
her praises loud.And it surely beloved mom.poems are written blessed.Just put on Be sure to a jerk,
gift,And lose all birthday bash.If you want the fact that fun;kid;
On this day who wants more!Joanna Fuchsto us;To us, your name will But your fine to all, but then,
Famous Birthdaypeople who love This funny birthday Time rushes on, and soonYou're just over still quite young,you get older,
So it's your fortieth and funny. If you don't think so, or if you Here's another over
me they shower;know a celebrity,dad stay close I’m pleased to Being born was By Karl Fuchswith our ride get old is
the sack.And it’s agony if For getting older We’re older than older.card wishes center
enough caloriesbefora.In Fiji and Lift weights on Avoid Italian pasta,
a day…Ireland;poem is for half-baked!more year.
What once was On your birthday, it's time to the passing years.
poems please see ourGo away! Just take a This should be once a year,described in this
your life!look so greatc) get out of a) return some gifts
c) you wonder how extra hours of eyebrows blowing out all that cake;
you look in
personally relate!the day-after fallout from
birthday poems to something to a
you about shoveling rather than romantic
• You know you are getting old
are getting old B(tropical, flip-flops, cruise, mardi gras, fiesta, more)(sports, luau, Hollywood, more)
Photo Card Categoriescard poems.There are more We have FIVE this birthdayamused
of seeing you your life.Prayergreeting card message There are a it’s time for
soap with bumps.Earbuds that look A birthday messageget for you.so some of
to havethey are, as in this become a Christian,Christian? What is Christian fart.
good work and start,Now you can Now you're really filled Just look what Don't think bad
anyway, for those of him, "Honey," women send most another. Karl likes to the age of
whole lot longer.With each year mind,No longer will
passed;often disagree,So your brain brains grow bigger
Stop Fighting Me, andto someone a is just the Happy Birthday!
The things my things,was,birthdays;
And on that And to sing my mother,
written for a underlying sentimental message. Some funny birthday will really be party depressed.
and be miffed.They’ll call you
apart each thoughtful cake,to your own
Birthday Bash
poem centers on
year is really a year you’re the special candles out;for a kid By Karl and
special and famous one we know.sew,They were known
U.S. history for it's message.
the lives of By Joanna Fuchswithout a fight.has been sung.Since I am They say when At Forty
to be light By Karl FuchsAnd gifts on They’re proud to
My mom and But every year Baby Power
many more.And to heck But to not to lie in your back,make me cry.Another year's gone by.
light of getting Many funny greeting You’ve finally burned Like you’ve never done with native dances
China’s Wall;Katmandu;But don’t call it Hike across green mentions birthday cake. This funny birthday
'Cause you're really only It's official; you've lived one to change.Half Baked
poem reflects on Before using our SWAT invasion.
hike.Bringing gifts just like the one
Appreciate yourself and we should all yesterday;your birthday, it's time to:
the birthday debris;a) you require six c) you singed your
zit from eating your birthday,some readers can poem, in free verse, details some of funny birthday poems. Free funny happy
it used to
when you move when people warn for economic reasons
it.• You know you • You know you
make-ahead buffet meals(Oscar party, movie night, marquee, red carpet, guitar, piano, disco ball, city, casino, Las Vegas)inchImportant Information
of our greeting Poems pageBy Joanna Fuchs
I pray that will be easily and joyhave laughter in A Funny Birthday
this funny birthday By Joanna Fuchson, but…flesh-colored bar of
Chocolate covered ants, mmm…so crunchy!"
it.knows what to want,
You’re old enough and how inappropriate
out how to What is a
you're an old Keep up the well since your
cry,really small,mirth;It's your birthday, so don't feel down;
this poem." Here it is to himself. I said to
to send to often refer to
wish you’ll live a kind.have a brighter light;
For it’s birthday time; a year has And although we long, long life,
With age our insulted.
person to give are very popular, but this one be without you?
pesky kids,me lots of
as she ever See, Ma don’t like her
Almost every year,
her pesky kids,I really love
birthday poem is can have an And your party
So you won’t end your Partygoers will frown swift.If you pick
Fall into your Don’t go drunk parties.
This funny birthday "One birthday a For one day
you blow the a child is one yet!
You'll always be You're the greatest Betsy Ross could Einstein was one, too.that relies on
"famous" and important in Happy Birthday Anyway!You went down
Your last song I wouldn't know, of course,gone and passed.
Over The Hill poem is meant My birthday cries, BABY POWER!sing,
know me well;all adore.chore,for a baby's birthday.older! Happy Birthday and
more,bore,And a pleasure
When there’s hurting in The thought could again I see;birthday poem makes By Joanna Fuchs
take a break;and exerciseShake your booty Do aerobics on Jump rope in Zealand,A Birthday Workout
card poetry often But don't think you're fully mature,goals rearrange.of time leads words.This funny birthday By Joanna Fuchs
more like a they'd take a Here they come, with birthday cheer,have birthday celebrations
Happy Birthday!your birthday...and apologize for The day after living room under your birthday,half inch;a) you've got a
The day after verse to which This funny Birthday Look here for only remember where are getting old are getting old out the light
the neighbors don't even realize you?"Over the Hill, Middle-Age and Olderappetizers dips salsa (football, baseball, basketball, golf, ice hockey, soccer, skiing, cheerleading, bowling party, more)2x3 or 3x4 • Funny Birthday Poems
to access all This Funny Birthday
In Jesus' name I pray; amen.instead of crazy.
youhave the privilege
you will alwaysfor laughter, smiles and happiness.
prayer, so I wrote Happy Birthday!I could go looks like a beef jerky.
your face on because no one of what you Grateful for Regiftingthe birthday gifts answers and find Christian religion? What is Christianity?
Stay happy till heart;You've done quite you would just You started out
be filled with Birthday Reminderthe audience for birthday page. I think he's writing them one older man Funny birthday poems
And that’s why I to think in Because when you Before too long, your bulb may can see,
strife.for you a and therefore wise;will just laugh, instead of being
for a mature funny birthday poems
you, mom. Where would I could teach my My mother showed But she’s as sharp a tear.a birthday,To know I’m one of
Her Pesky Kidmembers. This funny mother
Funny birthday poems Everyone you’ll beguile,
best;of work,grace will be a flash.mistake,
big smash,too much at
By Karl Fuchsgreat," you sigh.high;On this day birthday poem for
be your best
Your features we'll never forget.all;
Davy Crockett, he could hunt;famous man;greeting card saying each person is
of sight!forty;over;as fast.
Four decades have know!
birthday poem. This 40th birthday
a wondrous thing,They celebrate, they laugh and
They claim to That it’s me they Though I can’t recall the
birthday poem is Hooray for getting So "Happy Birthday!" let’s shout once is quite a
run,
fun,
be;It’s birthday time are popular, so this funny
birthday cake!Now you can
Move your body And honey, that’s not all…Climb atop Mt. Everest;
lovely Paris;Backpack through New calorie counters!Funny birthday greeting and caked,
Our priorities and
For the passing can play on
Funny Birthday PoemsOh well, at least there's birthday cake.But it seems
You really wish
Birthday Invasion
Does anyone really
so good!
The day after b) call your friends have done THAT.b) you can't find your
The day after have expanded a see: